Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Chasing Happiness & freedom

What was it?
Yesterday I called it “Rush of Feelings”.

I don’t know but in the morning I am someone, and in the afternoon, when the moon rays lighten up the bedroom, I can be someone different. Like a ware-wolf.  The problem is I don’t believe in it.

I came to the office so sharp, fresh. By the way I have not given up my 12 days of yoga challenge. Today is the fourth day and my legs are feeling better.
By the evening, something really fucked up happened at work that totally freaked me out. I will not explain in here. But it was one of those moments that I couldn’t help but completely lose my temper.

I came to Istanbul to live free, with no stupid rules above my head, and most of all to feel secure in daily life. But yesterday it was like a sparkle to show me it’s time to leave. 

In the exact day, I came across Rachel ‘s post in Instagram which had explained about her life before she becomes a famous yogi. And how confused she was. And how hopeful she was along the way.
I went home. For the first time I didn’t want to talk to my friends about it. At home, B seemed so far from the point that I was.

I did yoga for one hour. I was so sleepy due to long working hours, I could have done more though. Watching Chasing Mavericks I went asleep.

In the morning I knew that despite me being so emotional about what happened the day before, I have to live like JAY.

I try to send my love and energy to whoever it is to cause me have this line among my eyebrows.

Love you all.

P.S. I have to write to Cat. Gosh I miss her so much. 

P.S. -again- Here I just want to send all my love to Jay who made me so inspired I felt tears coming down from my eyes. 

Tuesday, July 22, 2014

And it will be alright

Slow down. Take your time. And it will be alright.

Maybe when Imany decided to sing this, she had no idea that it will be alright. For real.

These days I am so damn inspired. Sometimes I am afraid that I might die soon. LOL.

Yes, I get angry. I get angry and I say the worst words that come to my mind. I say them. But in my heart I have this fire of hope that I know it will never fade out.
I see people around me; their problems. Their anger when something goes wrong. Their happiness when they achieve something and so on.

For me yoga and art have become a way to express it all. Colors have become the language. Forms have become my accent. In between all these curves, you can find me. This is how I curve this line. This unique line of my life. With love and passion. Each time I press my both hands on my mat, and I feel the rush of blood under my skin, I know I am alive. Then I will take a deep breath. And I will start it with down ward facing dog. And my spine just gives me this incredible feeling of liveliness.

This is life. Love is all around us. I just can’t wait to give all my love to the next person I run into. If you do not see it, just slow down. Take your time. And it will be alright. 

love to you all. 


Sunday, July 20, 2014

Life is better each moment

Decisions. Decisions. Decisions.

Making lists. Words. Thoughts. Day dreams.

Mental visions that we are sure will come true only if we can do handstands better in yoga. Only if we can find the dream job and if we can hang out with that handsome guy.

Hmm. All of them can be in this very moment. You can start small. Actually, you “have to” start small. No other way. Promise yourself to be better in each step by the next month. And believe me you can.

To begin, begin.

These days I am inspired by free souls more than anything else.

I am much more fund of wind, and water than before.

Life, love is all around us.

I have started a 12 days of yoga challenge. It has started today. I will be working on my legs more.

What about you? What are your plans for this week?

Love you all. 

kisses. xoxo


Sunday, coffee, little journal. Silence. 

Friday, June 27, 2014

Friday Mantra

Accept who you are. Be proud of yourself. Raise your head and breathe. Be happy for your life.
Whatever it is. It must have a bright side. Find it. Be grateful for it.

Yeah. These are the things that I kept telling myself from the morning till now. I just want to make myself feel better.

And this is the most important thing. Just FEEL GOOD.  

Thursday, June 26, 2014

Secret door to my wild side


Another day in my life has started. Lately I keep listening to Nahko Bear, Black as night. His voice brings me peace. (It’s funny that I had forgotten the word “Peace” in English). 

I try my best to be as calm as possible. But some days I am so impatient. This period also is not helping me at all. Really.

Let me start like this. It’s been years that I am searching for my goal. Lately much more harder than before. Yesterday in the bus, on the way to work, it just appeared to me. My very first goal in life is to be happy. Yes. It’s not like I didn’t know it before, but somehow it came to me. It was like I believed it. I had tears in my eyes. I just wanted to get back to our house, hug B and tell him that I am here whenever he wants, that how much I love him for being around. And sure Maya was also in my picture.

Today I came to work, I feel something heavy on my heart. I am kinda tired of all these articles that I keep reading every day.

I want to apply for master degrees this year. And if I don’t get the admission, I will quit my job here and start traveling. I just need to survive six or seven months.

Lately, I have this feeling that it’s just a beginning. And in couple of years I will do different things and meet different people and places. I feel a door to my wild side has opened that will never be closed again. 

I call it real life of mine. 

Love you all.


Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Look deeper. Search for the ray of hope!

Hey guys.

Here in Istanbul I am blessed with magic. Believe it or not it’s here. Not in Istanbul only, it’s all around us. U just have to be open to it. You just have to believe it.

Yesterday I was having a very hard day at work. My heart was somewhere else, my mind somewhere else. Two different directions and each of them was trying to pull the other one. I was so damn tired, hopeless and angry.
I went home late at night. I un-rolled my mat on the floor. I sat there. I couldn’t do yoga. I had lost the tempo of my heart beat. I laid. Savasana was there to help me out. After that I put my leg up on the wall and just laid there. Tried to imagine the ocean.

Lately the thought of ocean helps me out.

Today I feel better. Much better. I talked to Gokce. I am so happy I have her after Cat left. Office without her is like a prison, and my chat with Gokce again made me feel like despite you think it’s like a prison, there will be always a light coming along the way.

Good day to you all.

I am going to start sketching and taking photos all over again. And here won’t be just words, words and words. 

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...