And all at once summer collapsed into fall;

Good Morning. Late good morning though.

Before I start anything I want to thank The WHO for Baba O’Reily. I want to shout as hard as I can every single word of it. It’s become the only reason I put my headphones in my ears and take a deep breathe in late summer breeze these days.

Remember before I talked about joy a bit? And today I am joyful. I am grateful for Maya, my cute dog, and for B who stands beside me no matter what!

Change is near for me. And I don’t mean geographically. I mean for me and within me.

I am getting closer and closer to write a letter to my future. I guess I am getting better and better with picturing my fears. My happiness. My fingers are all alive again. Last week, I went to D&R (a bookstore in Istanbul) and bought a Moleskine sketch book. I have started a daily practice of mandalas. I am practicing my meditation much more. Again I am feeling this rush of drawing.

I am so inspired. 

Mandala loving furious kinda girl;

The theme for yesterday was “Get Fearless” *.

I had to write the list of things that I am afraid of. I did.

Yes, I am afraid of heights, but no I won’t be dying looking down.
Yes, I am afraid of losing my loved ones, and no, I don’t keep thinking about it till I start to cry. Nah!
Yes, I am afraid of lizards, and yes I scream to death when one of them get close to me. (Maya ate one of them last week. Euuuurgh!)

Then somehow it was so clear for me. All I was thinking was the things that I was angry about.

Why am I angry this much?! Hm? Today Celik (A friend from work) told me anger comes from fear, you have to figure out what is it that you are furious about this much? 

And it made me think. I am not sure yet. But I think I have to meditate upon it more.

Also I want to buy a notebook and start my Mandala therapy.

Love you all. 

* #getfearless