New website is on!

What do you think about my new website?

http://cargocollective.com/e4elina/

I am so excited ! :) 

Making plans and breaking them;

My friends they know me as a list maker.

Yeah! I make lists. All the time. I have a whole shelf for its equipment. Wonder what?
You know... Markers, stickers, rulers, and lots and lots of colors, papers, etc.

Making lists take time. You should have the right playlist ready. You need to relax before starting to make lists. Meditate. Yoga. Playing with your puppy. Whatever that brings you back to now. Whatever makes you realize the tone of your breath.
Then it will come to your tea. Your coffee. Hahah. It's important. Believe me.

After that, for me it happens like this:

I sit. I look at my tumblr for a bit. It always inspires me.

And I write. I write. I write. I bring out the core of the writing. I start making lists.

It's one of the most fun thing to do for me. It really is.

I put them on the wall. In my journals. In my blog even!

Making list is about organizing your mind. It's about fading away the cloud among your thoughts. And see the whole thing clearly.
I used to be frustrated when I understood that I am not following them. But then I realized making lists is not just about following them and bringing them to act. It's a way to understand who you are. And it's so beautiful.

So never be sad or disappointed for not following your lists. But keep them. They are your journal. They are a better version of you that you know about yourself. They are the things that you know you want to do. The things that you know you can do.

What about you? Do you make lists? What do you make lists for?

Love,
eL. 

Each day, One mantra;

Each day I try to find at least ten minutes of peace. Somewhere quiet to sit and meditate. Ashley is helping me with my daily mantra. It seems like whoever is into yoga, meditation or any other kind of act of peace can be related to you closely no matter where they are and no matter what they do. Isn’t it beautiful?

So here, I sit down on my mat. My very first mat. It’s safe. I close my eyes. I place the palms of my hands on my knees. As I take a deep breath I hear the sound of my dogs’ paws running towards me. And she sits on my mat. Back to back. I keep breathing. Inhale and exhale. After couple of moments I find myself not following the sound of my breaths nor in precious “now”. I find myself near the ocean. I see my toes under the sands. I feel the wind in my hair. And the smell of the salt.

This is my now. I will picture it as long as I can till it comes true.

I trust universe. And this universe will bring me near ocean on time.

The video is dear Ashley Albrand.

Love,

eL.

I refuse to give up my wildness;

I have always been wildly indecisive, dipping my hungry limbs into all sorts of hobbies and professions and projects and interests. Not because I'm irresponsible, really, but because my spirit longs to sample each and every patch of life like sips of wine. I've been an artist, and a musician, and a journalist, and a photographer, and an employee, some at the same time, some for a while, some for only a breath. When something isn't the proper fit for me, I honor it, and then gently (and swiftly) let it go. I am forever learning what I love, and, maybe even more importantly, what I don't love. Some folks may see this as quitting, as something that should be shamed, but I think it's so fucking beautiful. It's okay that I'm neither one thing, or the other. I refuse to be bound by boundaries. I refuse to give up my wildness. I promise to always change my mind. I contain multitudes. I am a universe wrapped in skin. And so are you.

Thanks Kristen Hedges for the inspiration. 

All about my morning rituals;

I used to run back in my home town. I used to put on the scarf and manteaux and I used to run for 30 or 20 minutes or something. It was not very easy, I had to rush home, wash my hair (it was long back then) and then again I was headed to university. The weather was so polluted and the process was so tiring that I quit.

I have a morning rituals now. It’s so special for me. I wake up around 6, I hug my dog which I wish I had more time for it. Then I make tea, I prepare a warm water with a lemon inside and with my dog we go out. We walk a bit. We play more. Then I start running while she gets busy playing with grass or a mosquito J 

Nice image, right? It is. It truly is.

We get back home. I take a shower and have my breakfast and I go to work.

I run with my whole strength. I know that each step will help me to move forward. Each breath will help me to stand on a surf board one day. I get tired though. It’s not like the footages that you see, a wonderful woman running in a sunrise… no! It’s not like that at all. I sweat. I can not breathe sometimes. But I remember my Manipura mantras;

I know who I am.
and
where I am going in life.
I am confident and powerful.
I am unstoppable.
I am fearless.

I am so grateful and feel blessed with my morning rituals. 

You can follow me on Nike+ , it's truly an amazing app. 

Love Love Love. 

eL. 

Instagram

Follow me on Instagram !

https://instagram.com/e4elina/

LOVE . 

Friday of the months;

Hey everyone,

December is here. As I heard they call it “Friday of the months”; Meaningful, nah?

For me somehow it’s really a big, cloudy Friday!

I had a rough two weeks. There was this fucked up problem with my working visa and no one seemed to care enough to manage it. I was not in charge, otherwise I would do whatever it took to make it right.

Anyway, now it’s all ok. It’s fine now.

But it was like a sudden fist on my face to wake me up. I had to start somewhere. And I was lost. I am lost. But now at least I made a plan. I hope I can stick to it.

I am writing my new year resolution. It’s been one week now that I keep adding stuff into my list. When the time comes I will share it with you guys of course. It has three parts:

-Things to be done
-Things to be bought
-Things to work on

It has spiritual and physical perspective. I mean after all these lists that I have been making on daily basis, of course I get good at making one detailed one for new year.

You can also do it. I made a file in Google Drive, which by the way has a new UI.

Below I am putting the links that these days are making my days: )

For ones who love cooking: 

http://www.yummly.com/

For ones who want a new playlist these days: 

Also try The National of course! 

Have fun.

Love you all. 

Childhood days;

I want to believe that there’s nothing in the world like right and wrong.
I want to believe that our lives is about feelings, passion.

My mind is like diving into complicated feelings. Life has been hard lately. And I am tired of exploring my reasons for it. I want to be as much strong as I can, but these paradox in feelings are hitting me to the walls of I-don’t-know-what-the-fuck-is-going-on, and it’s so frustrating.

Music is trying its best to make me free of these tight strings. I am afraid of the day that music also fails.

Words words words. Faces. Believes. Talks. They are all around me, they are all in my head and I am carrying this huge tons of sadness that I even do not know where I’ve picked up.

I watched Elham’s animation today again. She made it when her dad died couple of years ago. And I started crying. Lately I cry a lot at work. And for some reason I cannot share them with B. My feelings feel stupid and unreal while facing him. I have not decided if it’s a good thing or not.

I need someone.

I don’t know who he/she is. 

One Day;

Yeah. I did start to run again. Actually now that I think I don’t remember why I used to run?
I think it makes it special, like a real desire of the heart. Hm?

Yesterday I came across my 2014 resolution in my journal and I saw that I have done 2/3^rd of it without even realizing. And it made me proud.

I put my goal to surf. For that I need to work on my body. Running and yoga is good, but not enough. Besides I am not a good yogi or runner. I have to work much more.

Maya got sick and she seems so weak to me lately. After this weekend I have to spend some time with her. She’s so cute and every day I come to work I miss her so much.

Each day, in the morning that I wake up and I remember that I the night before I went running, I just cannot help it but have the big smile on my face.

What about you?

What made you smile today?

P.S. I found this website by the way, it seems a good place to make your lists.
http://dayzeroproject.com/

How I blog?

Cocorrina asked her readers how they blog. 

She’s one of my favorites! I change my desktop every now and then with her designs, and the interesting thing is that usually her designs go with my daily flow of thoughts! Interesting, nah? I know!

How do I blog?

Let me start like this. If I don’t blog, I write in my journal. And I think writing is one of the things you have to force yourself to do, after sometimes you get so used in it that it becomes like a daily meditation. It helps you to get a better understanding of yourself and also tell you what? YOU will be others inspiration! Yes! For me, one of my inspirations are the ones who keep blogging or posting on instagram, etc. 

My other inspiration is music. If you look at my last.fm, you can see it! Of course beside my Spotify I use 8tracks, grooveshark and jango which is not scrobbling on my last.fm. 

Tumblr is also an inspiration. For nature I have to say the most! More than everything. My inspiration for writing or creating in nature can be too much that even thinking about it makes me inspired.

I have never ever scheduled my posts. Maybe that’s why sometimes I write too much, and sometimes I don’t.

But I know that the blogs which have their own way of thought, or are creating designs and ideas on daily basis can be more popular and more inspiring. People are inspired by those blogs most of the times.

I mean you have to have a clear theme. Like in life! :) 

Now I am asking you gherties, how do you blog? 

Love Love Love.xo

“The core of mans' spirit comes from new experiences.” *

Hey ghertis,

Sunday will be over in couple of hours. As u know here we had a five days holiday, then two days of work and again the weekend. I can not believe that it’s over. My disbelief is so strong on some level I wanted to pack everything and go back to Tehran! Not that I hate my job, seriously I don’t hate it. But I just want to spend more time with me. Blogging. Walking in the streets of Istanbul, taking pictures. And day dreaming,…ah! Day dreaming.

Slowly I am collecting everything to apply for MFA . You have no idea how frustrating it can be. One day I am full of hope, the next day I hate all the projects that I have done , and I start to count the money that I must spend and in the exact same moment I see Christopher McCandless 's face in front of me. Then I start to question my purposes in life. And it all end up in 45 minutes of yoga, struggling not to let Maya on my mat. It’s finished by then.

Lately, I see B so far from me. I miss a friend. I just don’t know who. I just need a friend so damn much!
I just want to sit somewhere think about my life, what friends I want to have, where I want to go, what I want to do, and then I want to get stuck in there.

My piece of art - Done couple of years ago - When I know music will be my everything.

But I believe in lobe within me. It moves me to right places each time.

LOVE LOVE LOVE. 

* From Cristopher McCandless book

Chasing Happiness & freedom

What was it?
Yesterday I called it “Rush of Feelings”.

I don’t know but in the morning I am someone, and in the afternoon, when the moon rays lighten up the bedroom, I can be someone different. Like a ware-wolf.  The problem is I don’t believe in it.

I came to the office so sharp, fresh. By the way I have not given up my 12 days of yoga challenge. Today is the fourth day and my legs are feeling better.
By the evening, something really fucked up happened at work that totally freaked me out. I will not explain in here. But it was one of those moments that I couldn’t help but completely lose my temper.

I came to Istanbul to live free, with no stupid rules above my head, and most of all to feel secure in daily life. But yesterday it was like a sparkle to show me it’s time to leave. 

In the exact day, I came across Rachel ‘s post in Instagram which had explained about her life before she becomes a famous yogi. And how confused she was. And how hopeful she was along the way.

I went home. For the first time I didn’t want to talk to my friends about it. At home, B seemed so far from the point that I was.

I did yoga for one hour. I was so sleepy due to long working hours, I could have done more though. Watching Chasing Mavericks I went asleep.

In the morning I knew that despite me being so emotional about what happened the day before, I have to live like JAY.

I try to send my love and energy to whoever it is to cause me have this line among my eyebrows.

Love you all.

P.S. I have to write to Cat. Gosh I miss her so much. 

P.S. -again- Here I just want to send all my love to Jay who made me so inspired I felt tears coming down from my eyes. 

Last days of the year (1392)

I think now that these are the last days of this year (Persian year), I need to write about it.
This year for me was something else, although it does not feel like a whole different year. For me, it seemed like I have been living like this, in this city for hundred years now.

Hundred years of living in Istanbul.

It’s raining here. Pretty much. Days after days and it just don’t stop. My hands are cold. But I am trying to keep them warm by the fire inside my heart.

This year was about big steps for me. Living with B. Starting my full-time job at dreambox. Getting my work permit. Being in Iran for one months. Having long conversation with my mom. Seeing them managing their life without me and Elika, and how lovely they wish the best for us.

I got angry, I was depressed. I became happy, then I turned to be hopeful. It was night again. I heard the sound of protest in the streets of Istanbul. I saw angry faces. I witnessed people gathering n Gezi park.

One of the highlights was Sani. A cute little dog. My very first pet. I decided to foster her for about 2 months, till my friend takes her to America. But these two months changed to 10 months, and now that I am writing, just one day ahead she will be leaving me. I am feeling a very heavy feeling of love and lust on my heart. On one hand I am happy that finally Sani will be with her owners, but on the other hand what about me? 

Will I take a pet in this year? I hope.

I lost a friend this year. Our dear MohammadReza, who went to sleep and never woke up. I was in the office when my mom told me. I didn’t know where to burst my tears. I listen to this whenever I think about him. He really liked this music.

I was pretty much luck to have B beside me the whole year. We laughed. We were mad. We worked. We were wasted on weekends (mostly we weren’t). And at last we are continuing making history together.

I am ending my year with my first session of yoga. I know I may have a long way to go, but I assume I am on the right track. Every day I am trying to take a step forward to self-improvement.

I will add my new year resolution soon. 

xoxo

P.S . Happy birthday to Jack Kerouac. 

P.S. These days are full of Ray LaMontagne for me. 

Etan - The Hunger (Official Music Video)

I think what she does is awesome .
What do you think?

eL.

Dolunay means fullmoon

Hi guys , 

good morning to you all !
As I'm writing to you the first rays of sun is reaching my bare feet . And it feels just right . 

Last night my friends came over and I slept pretty late , but today in the morning I'm as energetic as a stalk of whipped asparagus! 
I was searching for awesome Apps & I found these , thought you might like it too : 

-My wonderful days lite which is a private diary and it's so cute ! 
-EyeEm which has several filters for your photos , and again you can apply instagram filters on them. 
-Voxer which I'm sure you are familiar with it : ) 
And I'm using a Turkish podcast which I don't think you need it :D 

Anyway , as you must know about my passion towards Marc Chagall , today I realized that one of my good friends has made an animation about it . And I just loved it . I put the link for you. 

First photo of my instagram

Here you go with DOLUNAY . 

Hope you like it . 

eL.