Light in the dark;

 When work is shit, this guy makes me find the light in the dark. 

Last week of September

 Just look at this face!!! I can look at him for many many years. 

Day 34: Self isolation

Little joy: Finding a colorful table cloth in the storage.

Frozen betties smoothie + toasted bread + jam + cheese + peanut butter

Just eat,
Enjoy,
Elina

Day 33: Self isolation

You are probably fed up with food photos.

Sorry. I just want to document this. Because I love it so much. Dont hate me.

Love you,
Elina

Day 29: Self isolation

Today in Iran and tomorrow in UK is my birthday.

So blessed for all the lovely friends I have!

So so so blessed for the journey I am in.

So much love in me.

Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you <3

Aurora and I; social distancing

Happy birthday Elina.

Day 25: Self isolation

I learned that in quarantine I have everything I want. I'm a better version of myself.

I am working better. I'm working on my terms, my hours, my pace which tells me how much I hate rules and regulations.
Sitting under the sun is one of my joyful parts of the day, which tells me how grateful I am that quarantine and self isolation is happening in Spring & Summer. I could not do it in Winter.
I spend more time here thinking about what I'm eating. I'm cooking and eating mindfully, which I have never done before.
I get to listen to more music with more focus. I have time to search each DJ, I have time to listen to their work. Discuss them with G. I think next time I go to rave, definitely I understand more of the music.
I'm doing exercise an hour a day which I had never done it like this. I'm so proud of the strength of my body. I like my body more. I care about it more. 
I worry less. I'm more grounded.
I'm spending quality time with G. Getting to know each other and knowing that we might never get this chance again. I mean to be this much in peace while being challenged.
I read articles fully again. I read my book again in peace.
I get to be quiet for long hours.
I miss dancing so much. SO much.
I miss hugging my friends.
I miss my dog.
I miss my clothes.

But I am sure I am not missing fast-pace life of London.

I will not come out of this self isolation empty handed. I already have gained so much. I have so much love in me.

Sending it all to you,
Elina

Day 24: Self isolation

If you don't know what RAGU is, don't worry. I didn't know either.

Ragu

I am eating like a pig,
Elina

Day 23: Self isolation

Today was a good day.

Later into the evening, I had a fight with my family on the phone. Gosh I hate these fights.
My sister is still going to work. And I am paralysed with worry.
I called them & said I am sorry that I shouted.
I think maybe these days at home can be a good time for me to dig deeper in these family issues.

Gosh everything is heavy on my chest.

Last night I slept in his arms under the moonlight.

White wine with sunset

Burgers with BBC news

P.S. I miss Maya so much.

Breathe,
Elina

Day 22: Self isolation

I woke up today with a very very deep sorrow for everything. People dying. The rest living in fear. I read today on my friend's fb page that she's having nightmares of losing her family. She is a doctor herself in US.
My sister is forced to go to work back in Iran. I'm so worried for my family..
I know the rest of the worrying and anxiety compare to what's happening in the world is nothing, I know. But I can feel however I want to, no?
As this place is where I can share everything.. I revise how I started this post:

I woke up today with a very very deep sorrow for my trip to Costa Rica that got cancelled. Gosh I am so pissed. I was planning this trip back and forth for a couple of years now. And I was so close to go!

I just hope something good comes out of this mess. People living mindfully. People caring about the environment more. People being kinder to each other. Governments understand unity more.

Strawberry smoothie with a dark chocolate

Stay safe,
Elina

Day 18: Self isolation

Happy April.

Today I was about to go to Perugia work Journalism Festival. For five days. G wanted to come for couple of days there. We had rented a car. We wanted to stay in a castle... Well, CoronaVirus changed the whole plan!

I had totally forgot about Perugia in the past couple of day.

Tonight after we watched "Captain Corelli's Mandolin", i went to the room to sleep and saw that he has turned on the projector. And there was a video clip about Perugia.

I was full of tears. I was speechless.

I think I reviewed the speech Pelagia's father made about love in my head while I was tearing up:

Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like
volcanoes and then subsides.  And when it subsides you have to make a
decision.  You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined
together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is.

Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion.That is just being in love, which any fool can do.  Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away,
and this is both an art and a fortunate accident.

Those that truly love have roots that grow towards each other underground,
and, when all the pretty blossoms have fallen from their branches,
they find that they are one
tree and not two.

I felt love that night. Loud and clear. It was not new. I have it in me for quite sometime. For the past couple of months. And it's here to stay. It's here to warm my body and to give me hope for a very long time. I can feel it. 

We are in Perugia

Dinner tonight

Yumm - Pana chocolate

Coroni days with G are the best days! Shhh! 

With love,
Elina

Day 17: Self isolation

Today I was invited to an ONLINE surprise party. I find it hilarious!! Fair enough, seeing your friend's while you are in quarantine is the best thing, but I don't understand the surprise part of it. haha.

Today I was still very sad. I'm very sensitive these days. Fucking PMS. Ruins your life. You need to be aware of it all the time.

Mark these days as complete second year that I have not seen my family.

Be strong Eli jaan, more to come! :(

Good food brought me back to life

Us raving in the house with Bubbles & Base! 

Me kick boxing with G - Bubbles & Base online party!

Me kicking G - Bubbles & Base online party!

Dance,
Elina

Day 15: Self isolation

Today's homework:

The world changed these past few weeks and the big questions in our lives amplified:
Who do I most value?
What am I afraid of?
What keeps me hopeful?
What do I secretly love about isolation?

And today's brunch:

Toasted bread+egg+potato waffle 

And dinner:

Meatballs ;)

Happy Sunday,
Elina

Day 12: Self isolation

Today was slow. Sunny slow.

I woke up early. G didn't. It was still hard for him to concentrate. He made apple pie. Very delicious.

I have to say, I like it here. I'm so me.

We are finishing our cheese! As you know we did a big fresh cheese purchase. Haha.

Most of our food is with cheese these days. Happy we are not diary intolerant. We might be in future if we keep eating like that. hahah.

World is going crazy. People are losing their jobs. So many infected. So many dying. I still am having a heard time believing what we are going through.

Apple Pie

Salad with Burrata

Pussy tattoo

Love, 

Elina

Day 10: Self isolation

We woke up late today.

I forgot to tell you, from yesterday we started doing some exercise. 40 minutes of exercise with weights.

Weather is amazing. It's a torture to stay in.

Online shopping has stopped. We should not be more than three people together in the streets. In public places we need to stay away from each other with two meters apart. Pubs & restaurants are closed. People are still out in so many neighbourhoods.

I know for a fact that I'm lucky that my job is not affected with this virus. I will stay sane & get the best out of this quarantine.

These days for me is all about food, work, quality time with us. Today I felt we are real adults. The feeling of trust, safety and love was all over me. So much love for this feeling.

There will be loads of food photos on the way.

Sorry for scattered sentences.

Mozzarella with tomatoes

Courgettes and onions getting ready for pasta with ricotta 

Salmon with chopped tomatoes

With love,
Elina

Day 9: Self isolation

If last year, on this day someone would come to me and would tell me:

"A year from now, a pandemic virus will make you sit at home for weeks."

I would be like, "Fuck off".

Well you never know what's in the cards for you.

So when I say self-isolation, I do not mean that I have not left the house. I did. I went out twice. With full gear. Masks, gloves & not getting close to anyone.

This while coronavirus is changing human behavioural I think. I ordered some cheese from this amazing place I found (La Latteria) last week. I wanted to order some for him so he would not miss home. Today the delivery came, instead of asking us for our signature when we got the cheese, he took a photo from him! Haha. I laughed.

It's crazy to say this but so far I have been enjoying this self-isolation.

We have started watching "The Outsider". Very dark. A bit scary.

I try to do yoga everyday.

Today we planted a chilli pepper.

Pasta with ricotta, basil and tomato

*I have decided to document every day of my self-isolation.

Breathe,
Elina

Have a reminder for your 'Happiness Capacity'

There's a hidden joyful epiphany in finding your drafts when writing. The words you used, that you had forgot. The feelings that got faded away in time...

I got that today with finding a very old draft. 

I decided on a 30 day yoga today. I need to make a change. I need to bring light in my life again. 

Xmas dinner in the castle with loved ones

*I should always remember this smile, this night and how happy I can be.

Plan for a miracle*

I MUA  is the song that I am listening to right now.

I will go to the volcano

Melt my heat in Mauna keas snow.

I will go to the volcano

Melt my heat in Mauna keas snow.

Get waist deep, yeah get barreled.

All the gifts returned tenfold

I will go to the volcano.

I will go to the volcano.

Melt my heart in Mauna keas snow

Melt my heart in Mauna keas snow.

Hell, good thing i don’t require much.

Makes it easier to move and stand straight up.

A little tough love and the gentle touch.

The more i struggle the more I’m stuck.

The less i speak the more i know.

The faster i move the slower i go.

I will go to the volcano.      

Melt my heart in Mauna kea’s snow!

Lately I am reading a book about “JOY”.  You might have read it. In the first half of the book, it talks about the difference between joy, happiness, pleasure and bliss. And how easily we can mixed their meaning with each other. We think we are happy, but it’s only pleasure. We think it’s a moment of joy, but it’s the one and only moment of bliss.
It’s so interesting.

For some reason I love to spend my whole life learning about these stuff about myself.

What about you? Can you distinguish these from each other in your life?

This weekend was relaxing. On Saturday, it rained the whole morning. Sadaf came here around 4, and we went to have a “huge” lunch in Bagdad Caddesi. We were hungry as if we had been stoned for couple of hours! LOL. At night we were dead tired.

Today I went to yoga. Guys, believe me or not I am getting much more better!!! I may start Ashtanga yoga soon. And we have started kicking our legs off the mat and sending them one by one to the air in addition to start hand stand! I am so excited (Happiness:D) 

Also with Ozge and Sam we had started a 30 Day Plank Pose Challenge. You can also start it. I am in third day, and my lower stomach is feeling lively.

Preparing my dear fruit salad;

Maya, looking at the fruit salad; 

Have an awesome week!

LOVE LOVE LOVE. 

eL. 

* By Osho

Life is better each moment

Decisions. Decisions. Decisions.

Making lists. Words. Thoughts. Day dreams.

Mental visions that we are sure will come true only if we can do handstands better in yoga. Only if we can find the dream job and if we can hang out with that handsome guy.

Hmm. All of them can be in this very moment. You can start small. Actually, you “have to” start small. No other way. Promise yourself to be better in each step by the next month. And believe me you can.

To begin, begin.

These days I am inspired by free souls more than anything else.

I am much more fund of wind, and water than before.

Life, love is all around us.

I have started a 12 days of yoga challenge. It has started today. I will be working on my legs more.

What about you? What are your plans for this week?

Love you all. 

kisses. xoxo

eL.

Sunday, coffee, little journal. Silence. 

#100happydays No.2

On Sunday, I went to yoga class. It arrived there soon. So I could find a time to sit by the calm sea for a while.
My mind was as free as a bird and I was full of good energy.

After it, Babak joined me. And we walked together, had chai and enjoyed some-olny-us-in-the-moment time. 

Istanbul can be romantic most of the times. 

Smell of October

October is close ! : )